What Shamu Taught Me About Life, Love And Marriage.

Amy Sutherland

Physical

In Circulation

While observing exotic animal trainers for her acclaimed book Kicked, Bitten, and Scratched, journalist Amy Sutherland had an epiphany: What if she used these training techniques with the human animals in her own life–namely her dear husband, Scott? In this lively and perceptive book, Sutherland tells how she took the trainers’ lessons home.

The next time her forgetful husband stomped through the house in search of his mislaid car keys, she asked herself, “What would a dolphin trainer do?” The answer was: nothing. Trainers reward the behavior they want and, just as important, ignore the behavior they don’t. Rather than appease her mate’s rising temper by joining in the search, or fuel his temper by nagging him to keep better track of his things in the first place, Sutherland kept her mouth shut and her eyes on the dishes she was washing. In short order, Scott found his keys and regained his cool. “I felt like I should throw him a mackerel,” she writes. In time, as she put more training principles into action, she noticed that she became more optimistic and less judgmental, and their twelve-year marriage was better than ever.

What started as a goofy experiment had such good results that Sutherland began using the training techniques with all the people in her life, including her mother, her friends, her students, even the clerk at the post office. In the end, the biggest lesson she learned is that the only animal you can truly change is yourself.

Full of fun facts, fascinating insights, hilarious anecdotes, and practical tips, What Shamu Taught Me About Life, Love, and Marriage describes Sutherland’s Alice-in-Wonderland experience of stumbling into a world where cheetahs walk nicely on leashes and elephants paint with watercolors, and of leaving a new, improved Homo sapiens.

What will you learn from this book

  1. Positive reinforcement: Sutherland emphasizes the power of positive reinforcement in shaping behavior, suggesting that focusing on rewarding desired behaviors can lead to positive changes in relationships.

  2. Behavior modification: The book discusses how using techniques from animal training, such as shaping and chaining behaviors, can be effective in changing human behavior.

  3. Setting clear expectations: Sutherland suggests that setting clear expectations and boundaries in relationships can help avoid misunderstandings and conflicts.

  4. Consistency: The book emphasizes the importance of consistency in applying rewards and consequences, suggesting that this can help reinforce desired behaviors.

  5. Patience: Sutherland suggests that patience is key in both animal training and relationships, as change takes time and effort.

  6. Understanding motivations: The book discusses the importance of understanding the motivations behind behavior, suggesting that this can help you better address underlying issues in relationships.

  7. Focus on the positive: Sutherland suggests that focusing on the positive aspects of a relationship can help strengthen it, rather than dwelling on negatives.

  8. Avoiding punishment: The book suggests that punishment is not an effective way to change behavior in relationships, as it can lead to resentment and conflict.

  9. Applying training principles: Sutherland discusses how principles from animal training, such as using cues and signals, can be applied to communication in relationships.

  10. Mutual respect: Finally, the book suggests that mutual respect is key in relationships, and that using positive reinforcement can help build and maintain this respect.

Language English
ISBN-10 1400066581
ISBN-13 9781400066582
No of pages 168
Font Size Medium
Book Publisher Random House
Published Date 12 Feb 2008

About Author

Author : Amy Sutherland

2 Books

Related Books